to sound like a mad song before someone mercifully ans nigrying to stay focused on s later, a rap on my door, a curious pause, and tensified to a t she nearly fell off of me.

    quot; is it? Im busy. Cant you see tie on t;

    quot;; On trembled. quot;Its your motelep;

    quot;tell .quot;

    tave. quot;Im really sorry,  you need to take t;

    I pulled on pants and a ser, opened t taring at t;Someone betterve died.quot;

    It ioned turally, in my s. Upon returning ory t ting in t a stoplig four blocks ae, notucked in a cigarette pack h one remaining Camel.

    I spent trying to make sense of t a t killed  somet  trut me. My deceptions oo careful and clever, yet in my infrequent encounters ed cold, distant, and unyielding. Some private demons plagued  I felt no compassion. it, ers, and I could never forgive o tself,  ted our family to ts.

    itraug of making arrangements. S, no doubt abetted by ributions over many years, to alloo be buried in te tment, but ions. teen, o tears, and at ter all, and coming as it did in ter of my sopimed. I cursed to pay ts astonished me.

    As om in our touary to treet. A brigege of more trailed beers and I led the grim parade.

    quot;; I her.

    Sraig;Your fat of tory. to a salmon t;

    In t . Robins and t  stood in toic as a soldier. Seeing   e o o to our friends and family, and to me. e did not speak of ers back to to receive condolences.

    omen from cones. t more cool and quiet t did in t